Official Student Newspaper of Henry M. Gunn High School

The Oracle

Official Student Newspaper of Henry M. Gunn High School

The Oracle

Official Student Newspaper of Henry M. Gunn High School

The Oracle

Avoid family conflicts through cowering, confrontation

Written by Carolyn Kuimelis

  • Stick your head inside the holiday turkey when your relatives start discussing politics. If your family is vegetarian, stick your head in the mashed potatoes. Bonus: they’re noise canceling, so you won’t hear them scream in disgust.
  • Buy the largest box you can find, wrap it in festive paper, and hide in it all night. Pro tip: bring some snacks and a large, empty bottle.
  • When your family members ask about your extracurriculars, make up the weirdest sounding activity you can think of. They’ll be so confused that they won’t bother pushing the issue.
  • If you’re feeling bored (and feisty), bring up a polarizing political issue. Then, slip away from the dinner table and watch the world burn.
  • When you finally snap, either go big or go home. You’re already yelling, so you might as well create an argument that generations to come will retell.
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