In the summer, it won’t feel like you are wearing a wool sweater on your face.
You won’t look 10 years older than your actual age.
Food won’t get trapped in your beard. You won’t have to kiss bagels and cream cheese goodbye.
Unmanageable hair is not attractive.
Hair growth problems aren’t visible because people might be disappointed by the gaps that don’t fill in properly.
Having a giant beard can scare babies.
You won’t be able to hide hideous teeth.
You can’t retain a second meal in your beard.
You can’t give beard slaps to that one annoying kid in your math class.
Your face will be cold in the winter.
Beardiness equals wisdom. This is undebatable.
You could have had the chance to be a wizard #Dumbledore.