Megan’s Tips: How to get out of the friend zone
Written by Megan Li
Find some one-on-one time: The easiest way to become closer with someone is to hold deeper conversations when it’s just the two of you. Jump at opportunities to do so, but don’t constantly attempt to create them.
Search for compatibility: Remove any rose-tinted glasses and really think about whether or not the two of you would make a good couple. Learn enough about them to be able to safely make this judgment, but make sure not to be creepy about it. Obsession isn’t a cute look on anybody.
Don’t be delusional: Always keep in mind that whoever you’re chasing does not owe you anything. You aren’t having some practical joke being played on you by the cruel love gods. Use the time that you spend griping about being in the friend zon
e to figure out why you’re there in the first place.
Give them space: This should go without saying, but it’s in your best interest to not come off as clingy and needy. Be your own person and live your life. Treat the journey out of the friend zone as a sort of pet project instead of letting it consume your time and theirs.
Be patient: Even though it might look bleak now, you have to realize that it can take some time and luck to break free from the platonic chains of the friendzone—so chill out. You can gently nudge the relationship in the general direction you want, but for the most part, let things progress as naturally as possible.
Test the waters: Check your friendzone status from time to time. Be forward if you would like, but it’s really all up to you and how well you can handle (possible) rejection. At the same time, make sure you’re not asking too often, and please don’t take them out into a parking lot and demand, “Do you like me or nah?!”
Take a step back: If your position in the friend zone hasn’t budged, dig deep and ask yourself if all of this is genuinely worth it. Move on if you see that the other person is obviously not interested. Don’t make life harder than it has to be by drawing your rejection out. You may not want to move on, but it’s better than waiting indefinitely.
Your donation will support the student journalists of Henry M. Gunn High School. Your contribution will allow us to purchase equipment and cover our annual website hosting costs.
megan • Dec 11, 2020 at 10:20 am
thank you so much for these inspiring words. I really appreciate the article on how to get out of the friend zone. I use this a lot to try and get out of the friend zone and even though it doesn’t work I still love coming back to this article to read everything.