Following a hot girl summer filled with healing and self-reflection, I’m back — still single and hotter than ever. After enjoying the blissful solace of independence, I’ve decided that entering a relationship is the last thing I want to do, especially as I’m nearing the end of my high school journey. Although I’ve set this healthy boundary for myself, there is still one looming issue: cuffing season. As the colder weather and upcoming holidays create pressure to find a partner to enjoy the festivities with, I’ve found it increasingly difficult to avoid getting into a relationship.
Cuffing season generally starts after Halloween and extends until mid-February, conveniently encompassing gift-giving holidays like Christmas and Valentine’s Day. Yet this increased yearning for companionship stems from more than wanting a plus-one for holiday events. As temperatures drop, so do serotonin levels, causing people to seek out romantic partners to bring warmth to a lonely void.
Even if I did want to be in a relationship, it might be a challenge to find a partner willing to match my commitment level. With the prevalence of hookup culture, many people prefer having casual flings over exclusive relationships. Consequently, people feel inadequate when prospective partners want varying levels of commitment.
Despite my conscious decision to remain single, I’ve still felt the pressures of cuffing season. Navigating hallways full of hand holding, starry-eyed couples can be discouraging, especially when most of my close friends are in happy relationships.
When surrounded by these couples, I must constantly remind myself how empowering it can be to choose independence. After investing significant time and effort into self-improvement, I don’t want to stunt my personal growth by forcing myself into a half-baked, surface-level relationship for the sake of being cuffed. With such high pressures to couple up, it can be hard to distinguish wanting to be in a relationship based on meaningful connections versus simply out of envy.
While there is novelty in the high school dating experience, this is also a critical period to explore new passions. Without the distraction of a relationship, I have more opportunities to prioritize personal goals without simultaneously concentrating on someone else’s happiness.
Being alone isn’t a curse, and I’ve managed to turn it into a blessing by spending my free time with intentionality. I can still enjoy upcoming winter festivities with my friends and invest my extra time in long-lasting friendships. Though I’ll occasionally suffer from a bout of loneliness, I find comfort in knowing that there is no mandatory timeline for finding a partner, and my worth is not determined by my winter relationship status.
